I recently read an article in Time called “Ten Ideas Changing the World Right Now.” It was a fascinating read, but one of the 10 topics that stuck out to me was a term the author coined herself - amortality. She described this phenomenon as more than just an era of baby-boomers resisting the onset of age. Rather it’s a revolutionized attitude towards age characterized by “living the same way, at the same pitch, doing and consuming much of the same things, from late teens right up until death.” 

This graphic associated with the article made me laugh out loud as did her reference to Simon Cowel’s admittance to a reporter that he used Botox in an effort to “take care of himself.” Now that’s all I can think about everytime I see him on the big screen whether he’s mouthing “I diunt hate it” or critcizing (ironically) an AI contestant for a performance that was merely “indulgent rubbish.”

Madonna is the quintessential amortal living among us. If you are still uncertain how to diagnose amortality – think plastic surgery, aisles and rows and shopping carts filled with numerous cremes and dyes and washes (all wrinkle-free, of course!), endless body piercings, and large doses of Rogaine coupled with Viagra…

Indeed, this revolution has spread to more than just Hollywood. A few examples closer to home is what actually triggered this blog topic. What is a 50-odd-something-year-old supposed to do when he notices less lateral mobility on the basketball court but still keeps a college-age sleeping schedule? …Sorry Dad, you were just the recent and most vocal example…=) Or how about those adults who just like their pimple-faced teens are addicted to the World of War Craft or the Wii? What about those of us whose eating/drinking habits haven’t changed much since Twinkies and Doritos were a daily staple? Tell me, what is the purpose of that wicked comb-over sitting two pews in front of me at church?? And of course we’ve all met (at least once) that over ambitious mommy that clearly seems to be living vicariously through her daughter. Besides what’s so wrong with matchy-matchy clothes, teeny-bopper hair dos, lipsmackin gum, and some good gossip-talk to go along with the look? Nothing really…IF you are thirteen!

Is there even such a thing anymore as age appropriate behavior?!? What ever happened to the notion that age=wisdom and wisdom=contentment?

So the idea of amortality poses the following question: What could have caused this deep shift in attitude toward aging? I’ve wondered if one culprit could be the ever-growing concept of “starter marriages” where before long one or both of the partners begin to search for the next younger, newer model of their spouse – ya know, trade in the 5.1 for the 6.1 version. Or maybe its partially due to increased life expectancy that keeps people looking in the mirror every morning for ALOT longer than before?

Whatever it is, it’s got me baffled. 

Thinking about it is just making me hungry for a twinkie.